Random Writing Quote:
“Here is a lesson in creative writing.
First rule: Do not use semicolons. They are transvestite hermaphrodites representing absolutely nothing. All they do is show you've been to college.
And I realize some of you may be having trouble deciding whether I am kidding or not. So from now on I will tell you when I'm kidding.
For instance, join the National Guard or the Marines and teach democracy. I'm kidding.
We are about to be attacked by Al Qaeda. Wave flags if you have them. That always seems to scare them away. I'm kidding.
If you want to really hurt your parents, and you don't have the nerve to be gay, the least you can do is go into the arts. I'm not kidding. The arts are not a way to make a living. They are a very human way of making life more bearable. Practicing an art, no matter how well or badly, is a way to make your soul grow, for heaven's sake. Sing in the shower. Dance to the radio. Tell stories. Write a poem to a friend, even a lousy poem. Do it as well as you possibly can. You will get an enormous reward. You will have created something.”
Speaker: David Forsyth
Date: June 20, 2015
"How to Succeed as a KDP Select Author"
David P. Forsyth holds a masters degree in international relations and has pursued diverse interests and career paths. He is a licensed pilot and certified scuba diver. An avid reader of sci-fi, action-adventure, techno-thriller, horror, fantasy and apocalyptic fiction, Mr. Forsyth's professional endeavors have ranged from international trade to travel marketing, and from charter aviation to construction management. David lives in Malibu, California, with the love of his life, Pamela, and six munchkin cats. His goal is to become a successful enough author to focus on writing, and explore the world. He also buys the occasional lottery ticket.
Mr. Forsyth's books include "Sedulity 1: Impact" which has been a #1 Bestseller in three genres on Amazon (Sea Adventures/stories, Dystopian, and Post-Apocalyptic Science Fiction) and reached #23 Paid in Kindle Store during a Kindle Countdown Deal in October. His previous titles in the Sovereign Spirit Saga (Voyage of the Dead, Flotilla of the Dead, Deluge of the Dead, etc.) have also done well on the apocalyptic fiction charts. You can find his eBooks at http://www.amazon.com/David-Forsyth/e/B006PLOMMK/
David will be speaking to the SCWA about how to succeed as an Indie author using KDP Select for self-published eBooks offered exclusively on Amazon Kindle.
Upcoming speaker for July 18, 2015:
Speaker: John Vorhaus
"How to be Funny, Even if You're Not"
No matter what you're writing, it helps to know how be funny when you need to be. In this short, sharply focused craft chat, John Vorhaus, author of THE COMIC TOOLBOX, will give you his ten best tips for being funny forever. Tips include "comedy is cruelty," "clash of context" and... oh, hell, I'm not giving away the store here in this blurb. Come to the event! If you think you're not funny, you're wrong.
John Vorhaus is best known for his seminal comedy-writing textbook, THE COMIC TOOLBOX: HOW TO BE FUNNY EVEN IF YOU'RE NOT. He has written more than two dozen other works of fiction and non-fiction, including (with Annie Duke) DECIDE TO PLAY GREAT POKER, and the new novel POOLE'S PARADISE. He travels the world teaching and training writers (in 30 countries on five continents at last count) and secretly controls the world via his mailing list at www.tinyurl.com/JoinJVMail.